Longing for many more days and nights with this beautiful little being. She is on a drip, her kidneys are struggling, body overwhelmed with toxins.

Grateful for vet care.

Wishing for clarity: why did you become unwell, how can we protect you? If only we could know precisely. Guilt. Uncertainty. Fear. Sadness. Sweet sweet attachment.

Yes, we are attached and if searing ache is the price sometimes, I’ll pay it.

Be well, little one, rest. We are waiting for you. Your head bumps, your delicate pitter pattery footsteps in the hallway.

If only we’d known sooner. Listened harder. Looked closer.

Cats, the vet said, hide their vulnerability.

And yet, some part of you told us. Came to us. Sat in our laps. Let us see the signs, ever so obliquely. Life made us aware.

Be well, little one, let life flow back fully into you tonight.

We are longing to have you here, purring and rubbing our foreheads again.